Holiday curse goes small-time for Veteran’s Day; crosses border.

Mom just sent us a note from Mexico. I was all jealous they were going on a trip, until now. Btw, for those who have wondered where I learned to tell a story, you’re welcome.

Saw some ruins in Cancun but all since has been an adventure. Illegal connection booked by Aeromexico in Mexico City had us hanging in the ck in line for one hour, then rerouted to La Paz, about 75 miles from Cabo. After dark. Feared driving across Mexico. Bargained the taxi down to $238, turned out it was an old jalopy with no seat belts. Stopped for gas once, right afterwards had a blowout on a pitch black road, so our guy drove to a lighted spot and unloaded our bags on the road for all the bandidos to see, ran off to a lighted house a block away but ran back, discovered no wrench so decided to drive on the rim to a darkened dirt driveway that turned out to have a tire shack a mile away where we encountered 3 angry dogs and opted to stay in the car while they jacked it up and replaced the wheel.   Then about 90 miles an hour over black night roads, some dirt and under construction, and got to the hotel after about 4 hours in that “taxi.” My meager Spanish failed me….. looking forward to nada today. Hasta luego.

Destination: Austin, Share a Sale Think Tank

I was all excited about being invited to the Share a Sale Think Tank in Austin, because, you know, me, at a think tank? How can you say no? “I’m not very thinky, thanks.” Nuh-uh.

And yet the irony of the fact that the registration apparel is as idiot-proof as it can possibly get without an assistance dog is not lost on me.

Share a sale think tank1

For the first time in conference history, I know which swag bag is mine.

 

share a sale think thank2

If found, please drop in nearest mailbox and punch air holes.

More honeymoon pics!

[nggallery id=5]

Think Guy will ever forgive me for giving my daughter his number?

I just talked to Daphne, my 10-year-old daughter, and she immediately lit into me for not picking up the phone the last eighteen times she called us. Whoops. I did mention that Guy’s phone had international calling and that mine wouldn’t work here in Puerto Vallarta.

I told her a little sheepishly that we had turned off the phones and left them in the safe once we discovered we can could call home for free from the room. Must have forgotten to tell her. So, I promised I would check my email several times a day and call her after school if I could. (In all fairness, I had been calling before bedtime but she likes to check in several times a day and CLEARLY doesn’t have anything else going on.)

After we hung up, Guy found his phone, turned it on and said, “Holy shit she’s sent a million texts,” and handed me the phone. Dear Aunt Betty on horseback knitting an afghan.

Sun @ 5:16 p: Answer me!

Mon @ 5:46 p: Fine!

Tue @ 5:34 p: EVERY TIME I CALL I GET GUY’S WEIRD VOICE MAIL THING! TURN ON THE PHONE!

Tue @ 6:56 p: HEY EARTH TO PEOPLE OF MEXICO PICK UP THE PHONE! GUY’S VOICEMAIL IS GETTNG ON MY NERVE.

Tue @ 7:14p: ARGHHHH

Today 1:13p: PICKUP!!!!!!!!!!

Today @ 2:10p: CHECK UR PHONE

Today @ 3:02p: Seriously

Today @ 4:05p: I don’t need to know what your job is GUY I just need to know WHY AREN’T YOU PEOPLE PICKING UP!

Today @ 4:07p: I mean seriously the whole voicemail thing and Mytech or whatever pleaseeeeeee

Photos! Finally!

Day two of our honeymoon: Signed my new name for the first time, spent 2.5 hours with a vacation salesman (did not buy but made a friend—his daughter is spending a year at a high school near us so of course we were all creepy and said have her call us! if she needs anything it’s good to know a local!), burned my chest, got the spins from too many margaritas (the ones in the sales room were especially strong), booked massages, and are about to schedule our special private honeymoon dinner on the beach, yes, a private table out on the beach. Where no one has to listed to us being childish and inappropriate.

Have a few photos to share, from the wedding getaway and the first day here, then I have some work to do of all things. But mama’s gotta have new shoes, so suck it up, am I right?

puerto vallarta honeymoom

justmarried

directions

directions

cakewreck